Dec. 3, 2003

1. Does gossip about yourself count as "gossip"?

2. Whyareyoukeepingittoyourself?Tellwhatthefunnythingis.

My
space
bar
is
broken
so
this
is
the
best
I
can
do.
Deal.

3. While you have rejoined civilization, I am stuck here in mid-Missouri next to a sweaty, overweight man in hunter's garb having cybersex on Gay.com in Ellis Library. Sigh.

4. Unfortunately, I got stuck with the life without meaning or purpose.

5. Oh, Amy, Amy, you forget how much I don't care about news. I watch the OC and the Real World/Road Rules Challenge, not Hardball.

6. Shouldn't there have been a red flag in her substance-less little head?

7. We used to make out on the quad every couple of weeks. How do YOU know him?

8. It must be so much freakin' pressure to have everyone think you're perfect. I only have a few people who think I'm perfect, and I don't know how to cope.

9. And this is not an outpouring of LUST — well, not exclusively.

10. If only I would open up my eyes and pop a few Prozacs! Oh, the desperation of it all. (Here's where I faint.)

11. I must confess I'm a tad drunk at the moment. I might have had about six glasses of wine to go with my lasagna.

12. I'm going to keep e-mailing you until one of my lines makes it on your "Funny sentences in my inbox" post. Just so you know.

And a special bonus section, the subject of which is a J311 professor whose name I’ll keep out of Google’s reaches:

13. And on that note, I am off to pretend like I care about my capstone class, and for that matter, D*'s opinion.

14. So I told him, the next time D. gives you shit, ask him something like how to move objects into the foreground when you’re designing in Quark.

posted by Amy F. permalink